Hearing about people cheat brings an emotionally charged response from me. Expected, no doubt but I’ve also no doubt people underestimate how severe my reaction is towards those that do it. These past six months saw my good friend dating a man who she wanted to talk to me about.
She was nervous about telling me. “I’m seeing somebody…..and you’re not going to like it”, she said in one breath. My smile faltered. He was somebody high profile who, earlier this year, had cheated on his wife. I suppressed, despite my inner self wanting to smack her, and listened.
He was remorseful. She explained this wasn’t my ex who never provided closure, this man admitted it all. Surely people deserve a second chance if they’ve realised the error of their ways, she asked. She wanted my advice as she valued me. She wanted me to be straight with her. She wanted me to say it was okay.
It’s not okay though, not to me anyway – not if I was being authentic and saying what I felt. In my head, all cheaters should be dumped in a pit and left to their own underground orgies. To me, cheating is morally corrupt. It’s not anything to do with faith but rather to do with upholding good moral character. It surprised me slightly as to how much internal emotion this conversation caused.
I live in a dangerous world because I live in an idealistic world. What’s good is good and what’s bad is bad. However the world isn’t idealistic so it doesn’t suit someone like me. There’s too many gray areas that I can’t grasp. Good things don’t happen to good people and bad things don’t happen to bad people……..like they should. Sometimes, I think the rewards of life seem a whole lot easier to those that, quite literally, screw people over.
I’ve tried to understand what upsets me most about it all. Perhaps I’m shocked that someone so close to me, having seen the repercussions from an affair, would consider entering into a relationship with the very person that caused that type of pain.
Perhaps I once again feel deflated by something I have come to realise. Those who cheat carry on with life as normal……..there are no real consequences. But for those of us left in their path of destruction – it is us who continue to struggle with the consequences of their actions.